A New Beginning…
As part of the oppressed generations in South Africa, life has come at me with a vengeance, proving the old cliche, “what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger”. Traveling the world (alone) since the ripe age of 19, has taught me so much in life, yet, I am still so uninformed and insecure, without self confidence, especially when it comes to standing up for myself and having an opinion.
Fighting for stability in my family, has been a lost cause, really since the day I was born. However big and well known we are in society, close, we never were. Fortunately, with my travels, a handful of loyal friends have been obtained throughout the years, through thick and mostly, thin. Only the best, have stayed to pick up the pieces, and still are. These friends, are my family, as far as I am concerned. A couple of them go as far back as Kindergarten, backing me up and sometimes, getting into trouble with me. Those are still in my life, everyday, helping me fight my demons, grabbing them by the throat, facing them and kicking their butts. This is my new motto in life…well, the first one, really. After 30 (something) years of bad childhood memories and fighting for my right to speak as an adult, I have finally stood up and let the world (well, at least my parents) hear my voice. It wasn’t easy, to stand up against very powerful and manipulative people. Shaking in my boots, having sleepless nights every time there was a confrontation, or, on the so many countless occasions I was seeking their approval, was not an option anymore.
However, that said, something had to be done, to revive myself as a human being, and as a creative person, I leaned towards art. A lot of us being artists in our family, from musicians, actors and professional painters, I found it only natural, to start my own little projects to keep my mind off of things, and concentrating on pouring my frustrations into my art. Thus, the birth of my doodles, and some other things too, which I will enlighten you with. As many of my author friends say – it’s not important how others feel about your work…it’s important only for yourself, to love what you are doing, and that you, and you only, are happy with the results.
A big fail a couple of years ago, starting off my little hobby, was to ask for advice from the big artist in the family, considering that I’m more of a sketch artist, than a painter…and have never really held a paintbrush in my hands for a task, let alone mix up colors and put it to canvas! Immediately I was scolded for even thinking that I could get away with trying to paint, let alone sell my work, as I, did not attend professional art classes at Varsity, to qualify as an artist. So much for support from the family. So I decided to venture on, on my own, and grab the bull by the horns – needless to say – with the wonderful support from my friends.